Like a Sailor…
On swearing (or eye rolling, wincing, etc.) when you make a mistake.
I used to swear a lot when playing my musical instrument.
Whenever I made a mistake, out would come the four-letter words. It didn’t matter if I was practicing alone or playing in a group, although if I was playing for or with others, I could usually soften it to just an eye roll, a wince, but often the sound “shi-” would escape my lips.
The lightbulb moment came when I realized that swearing at myself at any time, even with an unspoken reprimand, was not beneficial to my playing. I was just making myself feel bad.
If you’ve ever been yelled at, especially by someone you care about (… and one assumes you care about your own opinion of yourself??), you may have noticed that being reprimanded has the effect of making you extremely unmotivated. When I am feeling chastised, I’m unable to do much at all, let alone be creative and open-minded.
So I stopped saying “shit.” I started saying, “Ah, OK. Need to work on that.” Or just, “Noticed that.” I haven’t totally cured myself, and I still do the occasional eye rolls and frowns, but I’m working on it. And when I hear others swear as they play, I wish I could help them find the great in their playing, instead of focusing on their mistakes.
Why not start today on the path to eliminating negative self-talk while playing? Begin with something simple: “No more swearing at myself.” Who knows? This attitude might even leak into your daily life.
Here are a few chapters in Best Practice where you’ll find more about silencing negative self-talk:
33 — Subtle Thoughts
74 — Discernment vs. Criticism
140 — Your Inner Critic
154 — Personal, Pervasive, Permanent
Judy Minot is a musician, teacher, and the author of the book Best Practice: Inspiration and Ideas for Traditional Musicians.
Judy has played and practiced piano since she could reach the keys, training in classical playing until age 16. She now plays traditional music in various settings on a number of instruments, and gives workshops and classes on Best Practice ideas all over the U.S. and virtually.
Judy spent her working life in broadcast television and digital marketing. She holds a 4th degree black belt in the martial art of Kokikai Aikido and is a certified yoga teacher.
For more information visit: www.judyminot.com/bestpractice
